Nineteen year.
And yet a stranger overnight.
Can someone so close
Become so far in such a short time?
It appears yes.
And how quickly the heart contracts
When presented with reality.
Devoid of emotion now
Not hate, nor love.
Nothing.
Memories wither, faces merge
And life goes on...
Just on a different plane.
The same players
Just different characters,
Different scenes.
But the lesson learnt has a bitter taste
And effects everlasting
The future isn't predictable
And nothing lasts forever
But no one believes when told
Except those who have learnt.
I wrote those words just after my dad walked out. At the time that act destroyed my trust and I felt that life had sold me a lie - the happy ever after. Looking at those words, again, over 20 years later and today on my 14th wedding anniversary, it represented how I felt then and reflects some of the reasons I stopped talking to my dad nearly 4 years ago now. I did try to maintain a relationship for my son's sake, but I was unable to get him to give us a day that we could go to see him after 2 years of asking, and now my dad won't contact me of his volition as "it's not his turn to phone". Last time he saw my son was about 8 years ago, over half my son's lifetime missed. Hubby, son and I are going out for an anniversary meal, and yes the future isn't predictable, but trust is back, we're doing just fine and today is good :) xx
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1 comment:
Hi jewel,
Firstly, let me congratulate on your Wedding Anniversary.
I can very much relate to feeling like: "life had sold me a lie".
I think we would all like to have our parents, in your case, your Father, be there for us to celebrate the joy of our children and the happiness of our relationships through marriage.
My Father disowned me many years ago. The last time he saw my son was when my son was about 3 weeks old. My son is now almost 21.
I guess what really matters, Julie, is that we strive to be kind, decent caring people. It is sad that we cannot always share our lives with the people we thought were close.
Yet today is good for you. Stay positive and please keep smiling. I think you are most definitely doing just fine. Warm wishes, Gary x
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